Unfortunately, many divorces do not end with spouses on amicable terms. When some marriages end, both spouses may find it challenging to work together, even for the sake of their children. If you had a particularly contentious divorce, you might find co-parenting to become a struggle. While children have a healthier, more stable life with both parents involved, you do not necessarily have to have a co-parenting plan to benefit the kids.
In parallel parenting, you both have duties, but you do not involve the other parent in your day-to-day decisions. Parallel parenting may have more benefits for divorcees with too much bad blood.
Limited contact with your ex
If you fear that you may fight every time you engage with your ex, then it is healthier to limit your contact. In a parallel parenting situation, you and your former spouse create a parenting plan that limits your need to talk to one another. You may have a journal that goes between homes with important information regarding your kid or you can set up an account on a co-parenting app to share important appointment dates or to track conversations.
Plans for all circumstances
In a parallel parenting plan, you must have a plan for everything. To avoid conversations that end in fighting, ensure clear details are in place. For instance, if you cannot pick up your kids during visitation, you need to have a written fallback into the plan. There should be a plan in place for every possible event. When the parenting plan tells you how to handle situations, you do not have to engage with your ex or fight over a resolution.
During parallel parenting, keep limited communication but do not rely on your children to share messages.